A letter

Dear last boyfriend,

Remember when we first met? I do. You drew me in with your wit. I laughed ugly and you didn't look disgusted. I remember when we were alone you invited me to sit next to you, and you rubbed my back. I thought this was a big signal to you that I liked you. But when I hugged you goodbye and left my face close to yours, you didn't know what to do. Ha ha, you underestimate yourself. I wanted to kiss the mouth from which all that humor came. And I did. I kissed it too long for a first kiss. But it was so sweet, you bit my lip and I sighed. I had to go after that or I would not go at all. I like thinking about that day.



You made me laugh, alot. And my laughter was healing. You helped me remember that I am good, and fun. You made me feel beautiful. And you made me feel safe, a rare and precious thing for me. We were friends. We had a lot of time alone and we spent the majority of it laughing and play fighting like wicked little children. In our private moments you healed me with your touch, and walked effortlessly though my deepest emotional barriers. For all these things, I love you.


BOS: That's all I can get out today Missing him a lot. Feeling sad and sorry for myself. I want to be married, I want the companionship. I want to say "us" and "we". I am sure I will be over it tomorrow. Sunday nights are hard for me.